Why?
Why is he almost 42 years old and still perfectly comfortable with striking out the only two batters he faces in game 4 of the World Series?
Why is he almost 42 years old and still able to fire fastballs into the mid-90s?
Why does he have four World Series rings and not as much attention as this deserves?
Why does he have four more World Series rings than Alex Rodriguez? (Never mind. Lots of reasons for that one.)
Why can he get away with having a stuffed parrot attached to his shoulder?
Why can he pitch so well, and also be so talented at drumming (in the 'pen) and dancing (on moving flatbed trucks)?
Why is he one of the only non-Varitek guys on the Sox to wear baseball pants the way they're supposed to be worn--high-cuffed, (red) knee socks and all?
Why does he have so much endurance that next year will be his 18th season in the majors?
Why was he really good-looking (and YOUNG) before I was born? (Sorry. Girly moment over.)
And, most of all...
Why, in the name of all that is Timlin, have we not already signed him? I mean, really. They picked up the option on Tavarez fast enough. What'll we do without him? Will Pap have to take over as captain of the 'pen? Will Mikey Tim take Parlay to wherever he goes, be it another team or retirement? In that case, what will Okie do without his good luck charm?!
